You’re hopeless, and you feel that there is no point of waking up each day only to feel all the agony, and just only wait for the night to go back to sleep again so you won’t remember the pain.
In this kind of scenario, you ask yourself, what is the point of living? You have no reason to continue life, at least for now. You don’t see a bright future ahead. All you see is your struggle, and that you’re hurting.
Clichè as it may seem but God remains to be our hope. We may not see Him, but He is still there. But it’s unlikely that you will be acknowledge it unless you seek for help.
I got diagnosed with major depressive disorder recently after overwhelming heartbreaking events (for me). I was prescribed anti-depressants and to undergo psychotherapy.
It’s expensive perhaps especially in private clinics but thank God that our governments are working to provide mental health access at no or minimal cost through public institutions. There are also NGOs and private institutions that offer it for free or on a donation basis because they know how important it is.
Prior to me taking these antidepressants, I was so suicidal. I wake up with all the negative thoughts upfront. All I wanted was to die. I could not see the beauty of life.
But since I started taking it (though there are side effects), my negative thoughts started to be controlled. They don’t actually disappear but they’re not the first things I would think about. Slowly, I began to go back to the things I used to do before, like blogging.
Thank God for antidepressants. Thank God for science. Thank God for medical professionals.
No, taking antidepressants does not show a lack of faith. It only means that you still believe in God and that He has a purpose for you. It means that despite your feeling that you want to die because life has no sense for you anymore, you still have faith that God is not yet done with you. You still believe that He still has the best plans for you and the way to see what He has in store for you is to continue living, which would be made possible through the medicine.